TRANSCRIPT
Office Ladies | Episode 257 – Webisode: The Third Floor
Jenna [00:00:04] I'm Jenna Fisher.
Angela [00:00:05] And I'm Angela Kinsey.
Jenna [00:00:06] We were on The Office together,
Angela [00:00:08] and we're best friends.
Jenna [00:00:09] And now we're doing the ultimate Office lover's podcast, just for you.
Angela [00:00:13] Each week, we will dive deeper into the world of The Office with exclusive interviews, behind-the-scenes details, and lots of BFF stories.
Jenna [00:00:21] We're the Office Ladies 6.0.
audio cue [00:00:22] theme ends and fades out
Jenna [00:00:22] Hello, welcome back to Office Ladies 6.0. Angela, are you ready for some jump scares? Maybe some eerie music and a really scary villain?
Angela [00:00:39] Why would I be ready for any of that?
Jenna [00:00:41] I don't know, but you better get ready because today we're breaking down the webisode "The Third Floor," which is all about Ryan making a horror movie.
Angela [00:00:51] Well Jenna, I know you're very excited for today's episode. You love a good horror movie.
Jenna [00:00:56] Love.
Angela [00:00:57] I hate them.
Jenna [00:00:58] Mm-hmm.
Angela [00:00:59] But I want to tell you I'm just thankful that there are no zombies in this one, because I really hate zombies.
Jenna [00:01:03] I love zombies. Give me all the zombies.
Angela [00:01:06] I mean Ryan tried to have zombies. We'll get to it.
Jenna [00:01:09] Yeah, I know. I got excited.
Angela [00:01:11] This is one thing you and I do have in common, though.
Jenna [00:01:14] What do we have in common?
Angela [00:01:15] Well I don't know if we should talk about it, but we both had a really strong reaction to this season of "The Last of Us." Josh had me watch it, he wanted me to watch it.
Jenna [00:01:26] I know! How did Josh get you to even start watching this. You watched the whole first season, then you got hooked. I was very excited because this is our first zombie crossover moment.
Angela [00:01:36] Yeah, I mean I love Pedro Pascal.
Jenna [00:01:40] Well, we all love Pedro Pascal, which is why this season was so very upsetting to us because we didn't play the video game, everybody.
Angela [00:01:47] Jenna, and I didn't know.
Jenna [00:01:49] We didn't know what was going to happen. And after it happened, I was so upset. Spoiler: if you don't know the video game and if you haven't watched this show yet,
Angela [00:02:02] Fast forward, maybe.
Jenna [00:02:02] Fast forward, because i actually need to talk about this and i know we're a little late to talking about it because everyone expressed this same outrage about two months ago,
Angela [00:02:11] But truly, if you haven't played the video game and you haven't seen season 2, just fast forward about 50 seconds from now.
Jenna [00:02:21] Yes. Pedro Pascal's character has the most gruesome death in episode two. In episode 2! I kept waiting. I was like, "Wait, what? Surely, oh, here she comes. She's gonna come rescue him." No!
Angela [00:02:35] No and here's the thing, I'm not watching it anymore.
Jenna [00:02:40] I can't watch it anymore!
[00:02:42] He was my guy!
Jenna [00:02:44] You broke my heart! Why would I keep going out with a guy who broke my heart like that. Like, if the show is a man who I was in love with and he f***ing trampled on my heart. I can't go back to him. It was too much for me and I sent a text to our group thread where I was like, "What is?" and I googled. I was like what?
Angela [00:03:11] There were, like, three angry messages. Angry, long messages about what the hell just happened here. Yeah, we both were pretty bummed about that. Josh is still watching. So he has continued without me. I was like, "I can't." I was, like, "Babe, here's the thing. You can't ask me, as someone who hates zombies (I hate zombies), to watch a zombie show with the one thing that kept me watching it is gone. That was the only reason I was there!
Jenna [00:03:43] OK, it wasn't the only reason I was there, but I am so distraught that I have not been able to keep watching it. I think I might. I think, I will get over this hurt. But listen to me, everybody. We all know. I was trying to explain it to Lee, because Lee doesn't watch it with me. He's like, "I don't get it. Just this one person died." I'm like, "Babe, babe. It's Pedro Pascal. OK?" I tried to come up with an analogy. I was like, "Remember what Meg Ryan was to an 80s romantic comedy movie?" Just an utter delight from the moment she's on screen until the end?
Angela [00:04:22] Yeah.
Jenna [00:04:23] Just makes you happy watching her? That is the feeling I get when I watch Pedro Pascal in anything. Just a delight. I'm happier now.
Angela [00:04:31] You know what it is for me? I'm invested, whatever he's in. I'm so invested. I still really, really need you to see his arc in "Game of Thrones." I really need you to get to Dorne.
Jenna [00:04:46] I am so sorry. I saw a red carpet interview with him, where someone said, "Will you ever have such a brutal death, as you had in Game of Thrones? That will upset fans?" And he said, "Yes I think there will be," because he knew what was gonna happen in The Last of Us.
Angela [00:05:04] I still need you to see him in Game of Thrones. Sam...
Sam [00:05:06] Yeah, I need you to watch that episode at least.
Jenna [00:05:09] I don't want to just tune in to see him die!
Angela [00:05:12] You need to see the minute he comes on screen. His presence, it's so different from the other characters you've seen him play. I need to you see him. My introduction to him was in Game of Thrones.
Jenna [00:05:27] Okay, my introduction to him was in "Narcos."
Angela [00:05:30] Oh, he's great in Narcos.
Jenna [00:05:32] Okay, I will watch Game of Thrones for Pedro Pascal. Done, I'll do it. What season is he? Like, how far in?
Angela [00:05:40] Could she just pick up with that season, Sam? She doesn't have to watch all the way to when they have the Dorne brother/sisters on.
Cassi [00:05:49] So he first appears in season four, episode one.
Angela [00:05:53] Thank you, Cassi.
Cassi [00:05:54] I say just go there, don't-
Jenna [00:05:56] I got pretty far into Game of Thrones when I committed to watching it. I'm pretty sure I've told you- When is that red lady on that extra island-
Sam [00:06:07] The Red Wedding?
Jenna [00:06:08] Yeah, isn't that in season 3 or so?
Angela [00:06:10] No, no, you're not talking about the red wedding, you are talking about the red lady who had sex with the black smoke.
Sam [00:06:16] Oh, okay.
Jenna [00:06:17] Yeah, her. I don't know what season that is, but that was around where it lost me.
Sam [00:06:22] I would pick up at season three. I would watch season three and then treat yourself with a first episode of season four at the end.
Angela [00:06:29] Have you seen the Red Wedding episode?
Jenna [00:06:32] I don't know what happens in a red wedding.
Angela [00:06:33] Oh, you would know. Nevermind, nevermind.
Sam [00:06:36] Ugh.
Angela [00:06:36] That's a great episode.
Angela [00:06:37] Okay. Okay. Well, we might have to make a list for her. Well, you know what? We should probably take a break because when we come back, we are gonna break down The Third Floor and Jenna, as our resident horror movie expert, you're gonna give us your assessment of Ryan's attempt at this genre.
Jenna [00:06:52] I will. I tried to give it my best critique. But that's not all, everybody. I gave Angela an assignment that I'm so excited about. I asked her to watch the first 24 minutes and 30 seconds of John Carpenter's "The Thing," because that is about the same amount of time that I watched the first John Wick movie on my first viewing. I have completed it, everyone. But Angela said she would watch that same length of any horror movie I chose. I have no idea what her reaction is. Don't tell me yet. But I cannot wait to hear your thoughts. Angela, I want you to know that I tried really hard to pick a movie that was not just a horror movie, but also a classically great film. I didn't just try to give you some slasher scary thing.
Angela [00:07:39] That's true and I appreciate that. I truly knew nothing about this movie before I watched it. I did not Google it. I did not look it up. I really watched it not knowing anything. So it's just my honest reaction as I started watching it and I will share that with you.
Jenna [00:07:53] All right. Well, we'll take a break and be right back.
audio cue [00:07:55] interstitial music cue
Jenna [00:08:05] All right, we are back. This webisode series has some really fun bonus content on Peacock. There is this cool black and white film flipbook of behind the scenes of this shoot.
Angela [00:08:20] It was really fun to watch and and you know what? There's also some interviews with the cast. I thought we should kick this off with what Mindy and BJ had to say about this webisode series:
audio clip - Mindy [00:08:32] The episodes are following the tradition of the characters wanting to put on a show.
audio clip - BJ [00:08:37] Ryan is directing a horror film that he thinks will be sort of the "Paranormal Activity" but set in an office, picked up by the documentary crew and by the main characters in The Office. The little things that fall through the cracks are the best thing to show in a webisode, I think. So I really liked when the group did Subtle Sexuality, that girl band that Kelly and Erin did, and I really like this horror film they're all working on. It's funny, the side projects that just get completely ignored by everyone in the office and somehow for the webisodes, we capture them.
Jenna [00:09:10] I like that.
Angela [00:09:11] I do too. So it's really fun that they get to explore what Ryan's passions or hobbies are. And I guess he's a big horror film fan.
Jenna [00:09:18] Well I think it's more that he's a film making fan. This, to me, kind of goes with his character trait of how he got into photography for a while. I feel like the horror movie part is just his way into being a film director.
Angela [00:09:33] Oh yes, and entertainment. Well, there's more cast interviews. We'll sprinkle those in as we go.
Jenna [00:09:38] Well, here are a few stats about this webisode. It was released on October 28th, 2010. This was during season seven of The Office. We aired the episode "Costume Contest" the same day as this web episode. It was kind of our nod to Halloween. This webisode was also nominated for a Webby Award. So episode one is titled "Kelly and Erin Move On." This whole series of webisodes were written by Kelly Hannon, Jonathan Hughes, and Mary Wall, and they were directed by Mindy Kaling. Here is your summary: Kelly and Erin are gonna pivot away from subtle sexuality.
Angela [00:10:18] Mm-hmm.
Jenna [00:10:18] They're not gonna make music anymore. Their new creative outlet is going to be acting in Ryan's horror film.
Angela [00:10:27] As the series starts, we are at front reception. Kelly and Erin are listening to the tail end of their song, "I'm Just the Girl Next Door." Erin thinks it's their best one yet, but they are disappointed by how many views the video's getting. It's not getting very many.
Jenna [00:10:43] Two. That's it. Dare I say, it's the two of them watching it?
Angela [00:10:48] Yeah, I think so. Kelly declares that music and dance are dead. That's It. That must be the reason.
Jenna [00:10:54] Yes, that's why.
Angela [00:10:56] Erin does add that it's also the economy.
Jenna [00:10:58] Oh, OK, so there are multiple reasons. They say maybe it's time to move on. But don't worry, they're not giving up on fame. They're just giving up music. So we cut to a little sitting area outside the break room. Kelly and Erin are now with Kevin. They are sitting on the floor.
Angela [00:11:15] They're having a floor chat.
Jenna [00:11:17] Yes, a little brainstorming session. I've never seen this staging before. I found it super creative and interesting and fun.
Angela [00:11:25] Fun. Yeah, I loved it. It kind of reminded me a little bit about when there was that group in the little supply closet having a meeting with Kelly and Toby.
Jenna [00:11:34] Yes, that was added back to the super fan episode of, what was that? Hot girl?
Angela [00:11:40] Yes.
Jenna [00:11:41] Yeah. It was a really, really creative way to shoot this. Kelly has a little pad of paper, I guess for her brainstorming session. I need you to hear how Kelly kicks things off.
audio clip - Kelly [00:11:56] I want to express myself, but I have nothing to say and no medium with which to do it.
Jenna [00:12:02] That's it. She has something she wants to say. She doesn't know what it is. She has no way to do it. Go.
Angela [00:12:08] Go, give it to me.
Jenna [00:12:09] What are your ideas?
Angela [00:12:09] Kevin, you're up.
Jenna [00:12:11] Well, Kevin explains that there's more than one way to express yourself, and he reveals that he writes poetry.
Angela [00:12:17] What? All along, Kevin is a poet?
Jenna [00:12:22] He reads one of his haikus. Here's what it is: Beauty approaches. I am brought under its spell. I long to be with.
Angela [00:12:33] That's it.
Jenna [00:12:34] Because he ran out of syllables. We'll never know.
Angela [00:12:36] Ryan is in the adjacent room and he is yelling at someone over the phone. He's very upset.
Jenna [00:12:45] He's talking about ancient zombies traipsing through Scranton, out for blood. Ryan is on the phone with someone trying to get them to participate. Would you say?
Angela [00:12:58] Yes, it sounds like he needs a lot of background actors to play zombies, and we find out that he is called the Evergreen Old Folks Home
Jenna [00:13:08] I need to play this talking head where Ryan describes the film he's trying to make, but more than anything, I need you to hear when it cuts back to his side of the phone call with the manager of the retirement home. Because what he says just cracked me up.
audio clip - Ryan [00:13:22] Picture this. 50 ancient zombies traipsing through the pothole-ridden streets of Scranton, out for blood. Sounds scary, right? Too bad you'll never see it, because the idiot manager at the evergreen old folks' home thinks it sounds exploitative. So that's where we're at right now. OK, your level of hysteria makes me think maybe you're not in charge. Is there a supervisor?
Jenna [00:13:55] [laughing] "Your level of hysteria makes me believe you're not in charge."
Angela [00:13:58] Look what I wrote: my favorite line in this episode is when Ryan says, "OK, your level of hysteria makes me believe you're not in charge." It's so funny.
Jenna [00:14:02] I literally want to put that on a post-it note for the next time I might need it when I'm trying to talk to somebody who is not helping me on a customer service call. Some version of that. "Your level of helpfulness is making me think you're not in charge."
Angela [00:14:20] It actually made me think of Cassi because how you guys call Cassi, you and your partner, call about your cable.
Jenna [00:14:27] I thought the same thing!
Angela [00:14:28] I thought same thing, I was like, "Cassi needs to say, 'Okay, your level of hysteria makes me think you're not in charge.'"
Cassi [00:14:34] I'll try it in the next six months, when we have to make that call.
Jenna [00:14:40] So Ryan explains his situation to Kelly, like what's going on, and Kelly volunteers to be in the movie.
Angela [00:14:48] Yeah, Ryan is gonna reject this idea. But then Kelly's like, "Look, I scream all the time. I'm really good at screaming. I can scream for free." And he's like, "Okay, fine, fine."
Jenna [00:14:59] He says that if the director of "Paranormal Activity" can make it work, so can he. I'll have you know I've not ever seen "Paranormal Activity."
Angela [00:15:07] Well shocker, neither have I.
Sam [00:15:11] The first one is very, very good.
Jenna [00:15:14] You guys have seen it?
Sam [00:15:15] Yes, the rest of the six or seven, you can skip.
Angela [00:15:17] Six or seven?!
Sam [00:15:19] Yeah, I'm not kidding, but the first one is really good.
Jenna [00:15:21] I can't watch, um... I have some limits.
Angela [00:15:26] Oh, I didn't know this.
Jenna [00:15:27] Yeah, I was going to explain this a little later when I was talking about my passion for horror movies. I don't love supernatural horror, or haunted house stories and Paranormal Activity is, to me-
Sam [00:15:41] You are going to hate this.
Jenna [00:15:42] -kind of both.
Angela [00:15:43] Is it because you could believe it?
Jenna [00:15:46] I don't want to feel creeped out in my own home. I already have a problem sleeping if I hear any creaks or noises. So I don't need extra food for that.
Cassi [00:15:58] That's so interesting, because that's the only type of horror movie I like to watch.
Jenna [00:16:03] Really?
Cassi [00:16:04] Yeah, I only like ghost stories. I don't like someone trying to kill and stab me.
Jenna [00:16:09] See, I can't fight back against a ghost. So, I don't know how to win that scenario.
Cassi [00:16:19] Yeah, I think it's because I don't believe in it, so... I don't know.
Jenna [00:16:22] Yeah, I mean we've talked about how I have the lady in my closet and all that stuff. So I just don't need to imagine her getting angry at me or anything.
Angela [00:16:33] Yeah, I mean, I'm not messing with the spirit world. You know what I'm saying?
Jenna [00:16:38] That's how I feel.
Angela [00:16:39] I am not messing. I think I've shared this with you guys that I was going to audition for a role in the movie "The Conjuring," and they sent me the script. This is when we were on The Office, and I ultimately had a conflict. But they sent the script, and I was like, "Oh, I'll read it." I was reading it in my trailer on the set of The Office, on my break, and I were so terrified. It's scared the crapola, just reading it, scared the crap out of me.
Jenna [00:17:06] I wonder if being in the movie would have been some sort of therapy for that, though, because you would see how fake it was?
Angela [00:17:16] No, no, no. But it's based on a true story.
Jenna [00:17:17] Oh, yeah. That's right. That one is. And I did see that movie and it's really good.
Angela [00:17:22] Yeah, OK, anyway. So you do have limits to this genre. I'm glad to know that.
Jenna [00:17:27] I do.
Angela [00:17:27] Because I don't want to watch anything where some ghost is coming for me, ever, ever.
Jenna [00:17:32] Well, I did not pick that for you.
Angela [00:17:33] I know. Well, this episode of the web series ends with Kelly and Erin so excited that they're going to be in this movie. That they are back, and they start singing this little song, and it goes like this:
audio clip - Erin & Kelly [00:17:47] We found our outlet, we found our outlet, no more singing and dancing for us. We found our outlet.
Angela [00:17:54] [singing] We found an outlet, we found an outlet. Go to two minutes and 34 seconds because Kate Flannery is just being Kate. She is not Meredith, at all, in this moment. Look at her. She's just Kate.
Jenna [00:18:08] She's just eating chips, bobbing her head to their song. All right, next up, episode two, titled "Lights, Camera, Action." It opens with Angela making a copy on the copy machine when Erin, wielding a butcher knife, jumps out and scares her. Angela is very upset, but Ryan is thrilled.
Angela [00:18:30] He is thrilled he says, "Erin, you were amazing" and then he turns to Angela, so earnestly, and goes "You are so good."
Jenna [00:18:40] Angela's like, "I am just scared." Angela comes to find out that the knife that Erin is wielding at her is not even a fake knife. "They were too expensive," Ryan says. "We have plenty of real knives."
Angela [00:18:53] They probably should have got a fakey knife that looked more like a real knife because that knife is so clearly fake.
Jenna [00:18:58] I thought it looked like a fakey knife too. That's so funny.
Angela [00:19:02] You know, when we rehearsed the scene, they didn't know what I screamed like. They're like, "You're gonna get a jump scare. Just scream like you're terrified." Brian, as Kevin, is standing kind of close to me, and I screamed and Brian looked at me like, "What the hell?" It kind of made him jump.
Jenna [00:19:22] Now, here's my question. We have discussed that when you jump scare Angela Kinsey, she might kick or punch you, because you really do not like it.
Angela [00:19:32] My first instinct is to hit.
Jenna [00:19:35] Yes. So how was this for you shooting this? I feel like this is your tickling scene. Remember how I really hate being tickled, but I had to let Roy tickle Pam, and Pam had to like it? It went against all my instincts.
Angela [00:19:49] This was OK for me, because Angela is angry.
Jenna [00:19:52] OK.
Angela [00:19:53] She's furious. She slams the papers down on the copier. So I could play that.
Jenna [00:19:59] You could use it.
Angela [00:19:59] I could. I was furious that they were jump scaring me.
Jenna [00:20:04] OK.
Angela [00:20:05] Well, in this moment, we also finally get to see Erin's costume, right? And Mindy and Ellie share in these behind the scenes interviews about it.
audio clip - Ellie & Mindy [00:20:15] I am the monster. I'm a combination of Jeffrey Dahmer on this side, and Lizzie Borden on this side. She looks hideous. When I first saw her, Laverne brought her in and were like, "What do you think?" And I recoiled, because it was so good, it was so gruesome and terrible.
Jenna [00:20:38] Oh, I have no doubt that hair, makeup, and costumes had so much fun with this.
Angela [00:20:43] Oh, yeah, I do love that Mindy said she looked hideous. I reached out to Ellie about this. I sent her a screen grab of her in this costume. I said, "Ellie, please tell me anything that you remember about the hair and makeup process for this look." I sent here a picture of herself as this character. And she wrote, "ha ha ha," and then she said, "Oh, my goodness, this webisode, I loved it. That was absolutely the longest I was in hair and makeup at The Office."
Jenna [00:21:16] Wow.
Angela [00:21:16] It was two to three hours.
Jenna [00:21:19] Wow!
Angela [00:21:19] Yeah. She said, "and get this, I still have the poster. But I don't know where to display it."
Jenna [00:21:26] Oh, they made a poster?
Angela [00:21:27] They made a a poster of her looking like that.
Jenna [00:21:30] Okay, that's pretty cool.
Angela [00:21:31] I know. But I also get why maybe she isn't hanging it in the hallway.
Jenna [00:21:36] She should just hang it up as a Halloween decoration every year.
Angela [00:21:39] Oh, that's a great idea.
Jenna [00:21:41] Yeah.
Angela [00:21:42] Okay, well, Jenna, as our resident horror movie expert, what did you think of Ellie's costume as this monster character?
Jenna [00:21:49] I thought it was fantastic. I thought they did a great job with it. It was very, very creative. But the costuming I really want to talk about is Ryan-
Angela [00:22:00] Oh, honey.
Jenna [00:22:01] -as the horror movie director.
Angela [00:22:02] Oh, I had a whole thing written that says right here: we have got to break down Ryan's outfit
Jenna [00:22:08] Yeah, I would describe it as full douchebag.
Angela [00:22:13] [laughing] That's great.
Jenna [00:22:14] And in my limited time in the horror movie circles, through my fandom and getting to meet the horror movie directors, they really do dress like that.
Angela [00:22:28] Oh, do they really?
Jenna [00:22:30] [laughing] Yeah.
Angela [00:22:30] I mean, he's got on the Elvis sunglasses from the Vegas years. He's got a zip up hoodie.
Jenna [00:22:37] And a beanie.
Angela [00:22:38] Yes, but his zip up isn't just a normal zip up hoody. It looks like the x-ray of someone's chest, like, the rib cage.
Jenna [00:22:46] Maybe they don't dress like this anymore. But back in the day... It was a really weird way of dressing and it made me laugh out loud when I saw him. I was like, "I have literally met that guy." I think I actually know who they are satirizing with that outfit. I think know.
Angela [00:23:07] Who?
Jenna [00:23:07] I won't say.
Angela [00:23:08] Oh, come on!
Jenna [00:23:08] But I think, I know who it is and it made me laugh out loud.
Angela [00:23:12] Will you tell me later? You have to tell me later.
Jenna [00:23:14] Yes, I love the guy. But yes, there's a whole presentational outfit.
Angela [00:23:21] Oh my gosh, I have no idea who this is. Well, now Gabe is talking to Ryan and he's explaining to Ryan that you can't scare people in the office.
Jenna [00:23:31] Yeah, Ryan's like, "I'm sorry, I don't remember seeing anything in the handbook about not being able to shoot horror films in the office." And Gabe is like, "Well, it does say you cannot bring weapons to work."
Angela [00:23:41] Right then, Erin appears with an axe and Kelly yells for Gabe to run and Gabe is completely panicked.
Jenna [00:23:48] He's in a corner. He's like, "There's nowhere! Run where? There's nowhere to run."
Angela [00:23:52] And then Ryan's like "Got it, got the shot."
Jenna [00:23:55] Yes, turns out that Kevin was filming from over at Kelly's desk. Then Gabe is now angry at them. He says, "It is petrifying and frankly unprofessional, this behavior." To which Ryan replies, "It's unprofessional for you, but for me, making films is my profession."
Angela [00:24:18] Oh, Ryan, Ryan. Gabe threatens to stop all production. Ryan pivots quickly in the moment. He's like, "Wait, your voice just then, it sounded so commanding." He asks him if he will be the voiceover talent for the movie, the narrator. Gabe is instantly flattered and agrees to do it. I want everyone to go to 1 minute, 36 seconds.
Jenna [00:24:43] Why?
Angela [00:24:44] Everyone is breaking but BJ.
Jenna [00:24:48] They are? What?
Angela [00:24:48] Ellie is breaking, but she kind of just makes it part of her character. Mindy is trying really hard not to break. Brian is breaking so badly that he ducks behind BJ, he turns his body and tilts his head down.
Jenna [00:25:00] What are they laughing at?
Angela [00:25:01] And then when it cuts back to Zach Woods, he looks like he's trying not to laugh. So I don't know what happened in that moment. I have a feeling Zach Woods improvised a few moments.
Jenna [00:25:12] I bet he did. I mean if I had to think about it, I feel like maybe he started doing some sort of voiceover bit thing.
Angela [00:25:20] Or when he says, "My voice is so nasal it sounds like..." I bet he gave them a bunch of different versions of what his nasally voice sounds like.
Jenna [00:25:28] You're probably right.
Angela [00:25:29] But they are all losing it.
Jenna [00:25:32] That's very funny. Well, Ryan realizes that he's going to be the first filmmaker to wear all four hats: writer, director, actor, and producer. Gabe mentions that Clint Eastwood has already done that multiple times. But then Ryan says, "But does he play his own score?" And he has a saxophone that he starts playing.
Angela [00:25:56] Where has the saxophone been this whole scene? It's just ready to go?
Jenna [00:25:59] I guess so. And who knew that Ryan plays the saxophone?
Angela [00:26:03] Who knew?
Jenna [00:26:04] This is the big reveal at the end of the episode.
Angela [00:26:07] Kevin's a poet. Ryan plays the saxophone.
Jenna [00:26:09] We're learning so much.
Angela [00:26:11] Up next is episode three. It's titled "The Final Product." Before we get into this breakdown, I have to share this little nugget from the behind the scenes interviews. It's Zach Woods talking about trick-or-treating as a kid when he was growing up. It is hilarious.
audio clip - Zach Woods [00:26:28] When I was a kid, I was really into Halloween. I got my friends together and we choreographed a full dance to the Bee Gees song, "Staying Alive." I would lip sync, we would bring a boombox and go from door to door and then we would press play and I would lipsync Staying Alive and they would do this whole choreograph dance behind me. I remember going to one man's door and doing this whole choreography dance and he was like, "Do you want candy? I can't wait all night," he got real irate and I remember immediately being like, "Oh, this was a terrible idea."
Angela [00:26:59] I want to see footage of that. I need to see Zach Woods as a kid hitting a doorbell, saying trick or treat, and then singing the Bee Gees. I need that in my life.
Jenna [00:27:12] I feel like we need to remind him of this story that he told because if you've done that, that's ingrained in you. I feel he could bust that out any time. Alright, well listen, episode 3, The Final Product, is exactly as advertised. It is the movie.
Angela [00:27:32] There is this opening title credit and it's got a warning. It says, "The following preview has been approved by the Motion Picture Association of Evil and is suitable for sadistic audiences only. Watch at your own risk."
Jenna [00:27:50] Yes, and we open on a voiceover, and it's Gabe, and he is narrating. "She thought it was just another typical day at work." Who he's talking about is Kelly, who is conducting an interview with Meredith, who is playing- What would you say, a fortune teller type of woman?
Angela [00:28:13] A witchy kind of woman?
Jenna [00:28:14] Yeah.
Angela [00:28:14] She's got a shawl over her head and wrapped around her neck. She has got a patch over one eye.
Jenna [00:28:22] She wants to buy some paper, but she has no money.When Kelly won't sell her paper, Meredith puts a curse on her. She summons serial killers from the past to unite and haunt the third floor for all eternity.
Angela [00:28:39] And Kelly's like "Whatever. This is the second floor. So I'm all good. I'm not on the third floor."
Jenna [00:28:45] Yeah, it's fine. She doesn't care that she has caused a curse for everyone on the third floor.
Angela [00:28:50] "You got it wrong, lady." Now we see Kevin and he's in his mall cop outfit. Remember his Halloween mall cop?
Jenna [00:28:57] Oh, yes!
Angela [00:28:58] Yes, he's got a toupee and a mustache. He's the security guard character and it's dark, he's using his flashlight.
Jenna [00:29:07] He's in the hallway, kind of out by the Elevator Bay and Vance Refrigeration.
Angela [00:29:11] And he sees Erin wielding the axe from earlier.
Jenna [00:29:15] Yes, it's actually a cool shot. You then see a shadow of him, and you see a shadow of an axe, hacking at the shadow of him and blood splurting everywhere.
Angela [00:29:25] It cuts to Creed. He has a talking head. You guys, he's a member of the press. He has hat and he has a little sign that says press.
Jenna [00:29:33] He is, and I need you to hear this talking head because he's going to tell you what's happened, and it's great.
audio clip - Creed [00:29:42] I've never seen anything like it. It has the right arm of Lizzie Borden, the left arm of Jeffrey Dahmer, the heart of Jack the Ripper, and the legs of all the serial killers who ever got away.
Jenna [00:29:58] So there you have it, that's our monster.
Angela [00:30:00] I also love the callback to the saxophone playing.
Jenna [00:30:05] Oh, I didn't even- I just heard that in that clip. He is playing the score, you're right. So during this Creed talking head, as he's describing the monster, we see Erin as the monster in B-roll. She's got an axe in her Lizzie Borden hand. She has a fork in her Jeffrey Dahmer hand. Then you see her wobbly legs getting ready to run.
Angela [00:30:32] Erin now goes after Angela, then Gabe. Kelly asks the janitor, who's being played by Ryan, why these crimes are happening on the second floor. Because, remember, it's the third floor that's cursed.
Jenna [00:30:44] The third floor has the curse.
Angela [00:30:45] Well, he tells her: they added a basement during renovations. So this is the third floor. Kelly's like [gasps]
Jenna [00:30:54] Kelly begs the old woman to reverse the curse, but it's too late. The murdering corpse of Erin appears at Kelly's cubicle and then sort of low speed chases her through the office as Kelly begs for her life. She tries to throw a candy dish-
Angela [00:31:13] That does make Erin trip, for a minute.
Jenna [00:31:16] This is true.
Angela [00:31:17] She does trip, but she bounces back up.
Jenna [00:31:19] Mm-hmm.
Angela [00:31:20] And when Kelly opens the elevator door, she's hitting the button and hitting the bottom. It opens and there is Erin.
Jenna [00:31:26] Inside the elevator. She's transported! And she kills Kelly.
Angela [00:31:31] The title card flashes on the screen: "The Third Floor, Coming to Theaters, TBD."
Jenna [00:31:40] And there you have it.
Angela [00:31:41] There you have it. How fun, to shoot this. It was really fun. I loved doing my scene and I know Ellie had a blast as well. These webisodes were always so much fun. Because you got to just do so many wacky things. But lady, let's go to break. Because when we come back, Jenna, will you give us your overall assessment of Ryan's movie?
Jenna [00:32:04] I will. And Angela, you will share with us about watching the first 24 minutes and 30 seconds of John Carpenter's The Thing.
Angela [00:32:10] I will.
audio cue [00:32:11] interstitial audio cue
Angela [00:32:21] We are back! All right Jenna, let us know: how does Ryan's movie fare on your horror movie scale?
Jenna [00:32:29] I wanted to do a good job with my critique. So according to the internet AI, there are certain elements that all good horror movies have.
Angela [00:32:43] Oh.
Jenna [00:32:43] And I agreed. So a great horror movie is a blend of atmosphere, suspense, and plot. I would add that a good horror movie also has a few jump scares and a great villain. Whatever that villain might be. Maybe it's a ghost, maybe it's an actual monster, maybe it's your own dark thoughts.
Angela [00:33:04] OK.
Jenna [00:33:06] I think Ryan's film has it all.
Angela [00:33:10] Wow.
Jenna [00:33:10] Yeah. Are you surprised? I thought it was great. I thought I was really good. I'm thinking about if I am a local filmmaker and I'm making a movie in my office with my friends, I thought it was excellent.
Angela [00:33:26] Wow.
Jenna [00:33:28] I thought it had a great plot. The plot was very clear. I thought it had good suspense. I thought there was great atmosphere with Kevin, as the security guard, wandering dark in the hallway. I thought it was a great use of the space. Again, if I'm imagining that Ryan is a real person and Dunder Mifflin is a real place, I thought he used the space creatively. I thought it was shot well. I mean, probably because Matt Stone was shooting it. But it's shot very well. I would argue that there is one thing that it is missing.
Angela [00:34:02] What?
Jenna [00:34:02] I think a good horror movie has creative kills.
Angela [00:34:07] Oh.
Jenna [00:34:07] And in this one, we kind of get the same kill over and over. It's just the same bloody handprint going down a wall.
Angela [00:34:15] Well, that might have been all of the special effects they could afford.
Jenna [00:34:19] And also, because the people they were killing, they weren't part of the movie, so they couldn't really... All they were getting was just someone screaming and then a bloody handprint down the wall.
Angela [00:34:29] Sure, sure. Like, Angela Martin is not going to participate. She's done.
Jenna [00:34:34] Exactly, right. But honestly, I felt like it was really pretty good for a homemade horror film. A plus for a homemade horror film. I thought it was great.
Angela [00:34:42] Well done Kelly Hannon, Jonathan Hughes, and Mary Wall.
Jenna [00:34:46] Great writing-
Angela [00:34:47] and great directing, Mindy.
Jenna [00:34:49] Yes.
Angela [00:34:50] So lady, two thumbs up then?
Jenna [00:34:51] I would give it two thumbs up. I would. But, you know, that is for the circumstances that this film is made. I did think maybe I could give a list of my favorite horror films that are a real big thumbs up for me.
Angela [00:35:08] Okay.
Jenna [00:35:09] Just because I do love them.
Angela [00:35:11] I'm very curious.
Jenna [00:35:13] Okay, well I already mentioned that there are certain sub-genres of horror that are not my thing. I am not a fan of the supernatural horror or the haunted house. We talked about that. But I also do not love torture horror.
Angela [00:35:25] Oh, no, no. I don't want to see any of that.
Jenna [00:35:27] Those are movies like "Saw" or "Hostel." Those are torture horror, and I've seen them. I saw the first Saw. I saw the first Hostel, they were too much for me. I also don't usually go for monster horror, which is what The Third Floor is.
Angela [00:35:44] But isn't that also the assignment you gave me?
Jenna [00:35:48] No. That is not necessarily monster horror. I think maybe it is, but I'll get to that. True, solid monster horror would be like "Texas Chainsaw Massacre," "Halloween," "Friday the 13th," where there's a masked killer on the loose.
Angela [00:36:04] Okay.
Jenna [00:36:05] Like, a type of monster after you.
Angela [00:36:08] Okay.
Jenna [00:36:09] However, I love zombies. Love. I think that's a kind of monster, but for whatever reason, that one makes the list for me. I also mostly love (my favorite, my favorite) is psychological horror and paranoia horror. I think that is what The Thing is. The Thing definitely has monster-y elements, but it's mostly paranoia horror, and that is my favorite genre.
Angela [00:36:36] So do you like the movie "What Lies Beneath?" Cause I think that's very scary.
Jenna [00:36:42] Do I know that movie? What Lies Beneath...
Sam [00:36:44] Michelle Pfeiffer. Yeah, it's great.
Angela [00:36:47] It's really good.
Jenna [00:36:48] Okay, well, I will watch it immediately.
Angela [00:36:51] It scared the crap out of me. I watched it years ago, not really realizing that it was a scary movie and it's terrifying.
Jenna [00:36:59] I cannot wait.
Angela [00:37:00] Sam, do you agree?
Sam [00:37:00] Yeah, it stands up.
Jenna [00:37:01] Oh, I can't wait. This is so exciting. Thank you.
Angela [00:37:05] I didn't think I would be giving you a suggestion.
Jenna [00:37:06] What a gift!
Angela [00:37:07] Okay. You'll have to let me know.
Jenna [00:37:09] Paranoia horror would be like "Invasion of the Body Snatchers."
Angela [00:37:13] Ew, ugh.
Jenna [00:37:14] I love the Donald Sutherland "Invasion of the Body Snatchers."
Angela [00:37:17] No, thank you.
Jenna [00:37:17] I love "Stepford Wives."
Angela [00:37:18] Oh, I haven't seen that.
Jenna [00:37:20] So here is my list of 10 favorite horror movies for all y'all out there who might want to partake. But before I give this list, full disclosure, I have not seen "The Babadook" or "Midsommar."
Angela [00:37:33] I don't know what that means.
Jenna [00:37:34] Too scared. [to Sam/Cassi] Have you seen the Babadook?
Sam [00:37:36] I have, I think you would like Babadook, I don't think you'd like Midsommar.
Cassi [00:37:40] Babadook is great, highly recommend.
Jenna [00:37:42] I need to watch it.
Cassi [00:37:43] Yes.
Sam [00:37:44] Yeah, especially based on your parameters of what you like in horror movies. I think you'll like it a lot.
Jenna [00:37:48] Okay, but it has a kid in it. Another thing that sometimes scares me is when a child's trying to kill their parent.
Sam [00:37:55] Well, you'll see.
Jenna [00:37:56] OK, here we go. Angela, don't watch this movie, but it is by Peter Jackson, who is the Lord of the Rings guy. He made a horror film. One of his first films is a comedy horror film called "Dead Alive."
Angela [00:38:11] Is it zombies?
Jenna [00:38:13] Kind of. People get infected. It is the goriest-
Angela [00:38:19] No, thank you.
Jenna [00:38:21] -movie I've ever seen, until this year's movie with Demi Moore.
Sam [00:38:26] "The Substance?"
Jenna [00:38:27] The Substance. Yes.
Angela [00:38:28] Yeah. No, I didn't see that.
Jenna [00:38:29] When I saw The Substance, I was like, "There we go. You've taken the crown from Dead Alive," something I thought could never happen. Okay, number two on my list is "Final Destination Two."
Sam [00:38:40] That's the one with the truck.
Jenna [00:38:42] That's the one with the truck, Sam. The first one is the plane. The second one is the truck.
Angela [00:38:47] I have seen none of them.
Jenna [00:38:48] Don't drive on a highway again after you've seen Final Destination 2. Number three, I put this on here. I saw it a long time ago, and it was a favorite of mine for a long time, but I haven't been able to get myself to re-watch it, which is "Cabin Fever" by Eli Roth.
Sam [00:39:03] Cabin Fever's good.
Jenna [00:39:03] It's great, it's great. Okay, number four, "The Descent." Oh, thumbs up from Cassie.
Sam [00:39:10] Cassie's out of her chair standing up.
Cassi [00:39:13] Angela. It's all women.
Jenna [00:39:15] All women spelunkers. They go in a cave-
Angela [00:39:18] Yeah, no, thank you. I don't want to be trapped underground with anyone.
Jenna [00:39:22] It is an amazing horror movie and it has this underlining theme of dealing with grief. One of the women has had something happen in her life, and they go spelunking to kind of help her through this difficult time in her life and there is stuff in the cave. It's very orc like, lady.
Angela [00:39:46] No. Thank you.
Jenna [00:39:47] Okay, number five is "It Follows."
Angela [00:39:50] I don't like anything called "it."
Sam [00:39:52] Oh, I think you would like It Follows.
Angela [00:39:54] I don't think so.
Jenna [00:39:56] It Follows also has a great theme about women, and what would you say, the perils of misogyny?
Sam [00:40:05] Original sin, I guess.
Jenna [00:40:07] Yeah. It's great. Number six is David Cronenberg's "The Fly."
Angela [00:40:13] I have seen The Fly.
Jenna [00:40:15] Similar to The Thing, I think.
Angela [00:40:16] Yeah, I saw that in college and I look at flies differently now.
Jenna [00:40:22] How can you not? It changes you forever.
Angela [00:40:26] It does.
Jenna [00:40:27] Okay, number seven is George Romero's "Dawn of the Dead." The original Dawn of the Dead.
Angela [00:40:30] Not the Brad Pitt one.
Jenna [00:40:33] Brad Pitt isn't in any of the Dawn of the Deads.
Sam [00:40:35] That's World War Z.
Angela [00:40:36] Thank you.
Jenna [00:40:37] Yes, the remake of Dawn of the Dead is also very good.
Angela [00:40:42] Yeah, it's all zombies. I'm not doing it.
Jenna [00:40:47] Number eight is "A Nightmare on Elm Street, Part Three." This is my exception to not loving monster horror. I actually love Freddy Krueger because there is a paranoia element with not being able to sleep and people not believing you that someone's attacking you in your dreams.
Angela [00:41:00] In high school, all of my friends got together and they made me watch "Nightmare on Elm Street." I hated it.
Jenna [00:41:08] Well, number three is the one where she actually gets put in an insane asylum and they're drugging her to go to sleep. So she gets super stuck in her dreams with Freddy Krueger, it's so good. Number nine, another paranoia horror, "The Faculty" by Robert Rodriguez.
Sam [00:41:27] That's, um, what's his name? He's having a resurgence right now.
Jenna [00:41:30] Josh Hartnett.
Sam [00:41:31] Yes, that's right.
Jenna [00:41:32] Sure is. He's so good.
Sam [00:41:33] Elijah Wood's in that too.
Jenna [00:41:34] Mm-hmm, I think so
Sam [00:41:36] Angela, how would you be with a comedic movie like "Shaun of the Dead?"
Jenna [00:41:40] I watched Shaun of the Dead.
Sam [00:41:42] Okay. And that?
Angela [00:41:43] It was okay. I didn't like the zombie parts.
Sam [00:41:45] Okay, fair enough
Jenna [00:41:47] All right, and then finally on my list (and I'm saying it 10th, but it might be my number one) is John Carpenter's "The Thing." So Angela, I am turning it over to you. I cannot wait to hear your assessment. And you saw, I just want you to realize, of the 10 movies that I just listed,
Angela [00:42:05] Mm-hmm.
Jenna [00:42:05] I really picked the one that I thought you would actually like.
Angela [00:42:09] Well I really appreciate that. I really do, because all of those that you listed prior sounded horrible and I'm thankful.
Jenna [00:42:18] I want you to know that those were the other choices.
Angela [00:42:22] Yeah well, what in rewatching The Third Floor and all of these behind the scenes interviews, I did discover that I'm not the only The Office cast member that doesn't like horror movies.
Jenna [00:42:33] Okay.
Angela [00:42:34] Here's what Mindy and BJ had to say about the genre:
audio clip - BJ & Mindy [00:42:37] I actually feel very uncomfortable in horror movies. I'm not a horror fan. I'm a horror guy. I can't even say the word horror. It sounds like something else.
Angela [00:42:52] So I am in good company, but I did watch The Thing. I videoed myself so I could see and play back my honest reactions to watching it.
Jenna [00:43:05] You videoed yourself?
Angela [00:43:07] I videoed myself watching it, I watched it during the day, in the afternoon, because I didn't want to get scared. I have all these videos of me watching it and reacting in real time. Here are some of my very first reactions. I am quoting myself, I transcribed the video. Because to play it would be 24 minutes and I thought, "I can't play 24 minutes of me reacting." So I will share with you my first reactions to this movie.
Jenna [00:43:38] OK. I cannot wait to hear these.
Angela [00:43:41] Sam, Cassi, Jenna- The thing is, I have the whole video. So I can share part of it in stories, maybe. Here it is. First of all, I should tell you that this movie has a very slow build. I was so invested that I ended up watching the whole movie.
Jenna [00:44:00] [loud, excited screaming]
Angela [00:44:01] Oh my god, my ears!
Jenna [00:44:03] [screaming] Oh my God!
Angela [00:44:11] Okay, that was such a great reaction, Jenna.
Jenna [00:44:14] Oh, my God, you watched the whole thing?!
Angela [00:44:16] I watched the whole thing.
Jenna [00:44:17] What?! You watched it all! But I had you cut off at the most cliffhanger-y spot.
Angela [00:44:25] You did.
Jenna [00:44:26] But with enough time to reveal the first, like, monster-y gross thing.
Angela [00:44:31] Okay, so here were my first reactions.
Jenna [00:44:33] I was just gonna ask you, cuz you did text me and you said, "I might need to watch a little further" and I was just wondering if you got to the dogs. That's all I was like, "Oh, I wonder if... I can't believe she didn't turn it off after the dogs."
Angela [00:44:46] Okay, okay, okay. Like I said, I started to just record myself watching it for the first time. I ultimately hit stop, because I didn't even want the distraction of myself.
Jenna [00:45:00] Watching yourself, basically. Yeah
Angela [00:45:01] Yeah, in my periphery. I just was so invested in the movie. I just wanted to be an audience member.
Jenna [00:45:07] It's a good plot.
Angela [00:45:08] It's a really good plot. It's a simple plot. Here are my first reactions, and now I am quoting myself: creepy music. Just film titles and creepy music. Still film titles and creepy music.
Jenna [00:45:23] It goes on a while.
Angela [00:45:24] Oh, it's a starry night. Something's flying in the sky. Oh, It's spaceship, burning through the atmosphere. Now it says "The Thing" and there's lightning. The screen now says "Antarctica, 1982." It looks really cold.
Jenna [00:45:37] So cold.
Angela [00:45:39] There's a helicopter, they're getting lower. There's a guy leaning out of it with binocular things. Oh, there is a dog. I think it's a husky, it might be a wolf. I can't tell. It's running like crazy, running, running running. The dog just looked right at the helicopter and now it's running. Oh no, they're gonna shoot it, why? I am so mad at this helicopter right now. Run dog! Jenna. I'm gonna be so mad if they kill this dog. Oh wait, there's a sign: United States National Science Institute Station Four. Oh, there're a lot of dudes. There's a ping pong table. They're making whiskey. Oh, they are drinking whiskey. Oh, it's Kurt Russell! He's playing chess on an old timey computer. Wait a second. This computer has a really sexy voice. She's like, [doing a sultry voice] "My move to Rook 3." Kurt is very scruffy. I like it. Oh, he lost and he's so mad. He's pouring whiskey into the computer. He fried it. Hey, there's a guy on roller skates.
Jenna [00:46:42] There's a guys on roller skates!
Angela [00:46:44] And then I just really freak out because now the helicopter circling back now they're firing at the dog. What is wrong! Then he gets out of the helicopter and then he throws a grenade but by accident? I think he throws it backwards and he burns up his own helicopter.
Jenna [00:46:59] He blows up his friend and his whole helicopter!
Sam [00:47:02] What was the first time you yelled out loud at the screen?
Jenna [00:47:05] Oh, when they were shooting at the dog?
Angela [00:47:07] Yes, I have it. I have it on video.
audio clip - Angela [00:47:14] Oh, there's a dog! It's a husky. He's running running running. He's looking at the helicopter and now he's running away from the helicopter and the helicopter's, like, coming in. Anyway, it's running, it running. Oh no, they're going to shoot it?! Why?! Don't shoot the dog!
Angela [00:47:33] Anyway, okay. So what we learn is in this helicopter they're speaking Norwegian, and they are trying to shoot the dog, right? One of the American guys shoots the Norwegian guy because he's shooting at the dog. But he ends up shooting one of their dudes in the leg.
Jenna [00:47:49] Yeah, all these American scientists in Antarctica know is that a helicopter has landed, it is blown up, someone has left the helicopter and is shooting at them. So they kill the guy and then the lone survivor is this dog.
Angela [00:48:05] This dog that they then adopt. That they bring into their science station in Antarctica. But this one guy is a doctor, and he's like, "Hey, I want to know what's going on with them. Maybe they've gone stir crazy. Let's go see." There's a storm coming, that's never a good thing. Then the guy Kurt Russell plays, Mac, he wears like a-
Jenna [00:48:27] By the way, you're welcome. I only gave you the Pedro Pascal of his time.
Angela [00:48:32] Oh, he's Mr. Kurt Russell. He's scruffy and super hot.
Jenna [00:48:35] And his voice is amazing.
Angela [00:48:38] Oh yeah. He's Mac, with his sideways cowboy hat that he wears.
Jenna [00:48:41] He drinks so much whiskey.
Angela [00:48:42] Everybody drinks. Everyone's drinking.
Jenna [00:48:44] They're drinking constantly. I don't understand how they ever get any work done at this facility. Whatever they're supposed to be doing there.
Angela [00:48:51] Mac and this doctor, they go to the Norwegian station, right?
Jenna [00:48:58] Yeah. To see what happened.
Angela [00:48:59] It has been blown to bits. It's charred. It's frozen and they find this grossest looking thing. It's so gross. It looks like it has two heads and multiple appendages. The doctor's like, "We're taking it back with us." I'm like, "what?" That was the second time I yelled, Sam.
Jenna [00:49:22] But hold on, it's not gonna matter if they brought that thing back-
Angela [00:49:26] Cause the dog is there, but I don't know that. I don't know that yet.
Jenna [00:49:30] You don't know that yet. That's fair.
Angela [00:49:30] So right now, I'm thinking, "You're idiots. Why would you take this weird thing back?" And then immediately they get it back and they start an autopsy on it. It's so disgusting.
Jenna [00:49:41] That's where I stopped it for you. I thought maybe that's all Angela can stand.
Angela [00:49:47] No, I was in. I'm like, "This thing on this autopsy table is gonna kill them all," but what I didn't know is the dog I had been rooting for, all along, had been mutated by the thing. It splits in half in a dog kennel, and all these things come flying out of it, and it gets all the other dogs. Part of it, you see, wiggles out.
Jenna [00:50:15] Yep,
Angela [00:50:15] and I'm like, "Oh, that's going to be-"
Sam [00:50:16] This is a perfect description of the movie, The Thing. This is perfect.
Angela [00:50:20] And then immediately I'm like, "They're all dead."
Jenna [00:50:23] We know this now.
Angela [00:50:24] They're all going to die.
Jenna [00:50:27] Listen, we don't have to describe the whole movie to you, but it is so good and it goes on and on and there is such paranoia because they don't know who's infected and who's not.
Angela [00:50:37] It's very hard to tell who's infected. Also, they're not great at communicating with one another and they separate. I'm always like, "why, why?" When they're like, "You two go there." I'm like "they're dead."
Jenna [00:50:48] Here's the other thing about this movie that is so amazing. It's from so long ago. There is no CGI crapola in this movie. It's not computer generated. It is all practical effects. I have to give a shout out to the special effects guy, it's Rob Botton. He was only 22 years old when he did the effects for this movie, he also did the affects for "Total Recall." You know that scene in Total Recall where the ladies face splits open?
Angela [00:51:14] Oh, yeah.
Jenna [00:51:15] That's him. But the practical effects in this are nuts. How about the scene where- I'm sure you didn't see it coming, I don't know how you made it through it, when they go to do the the [makes clunk noise] of the CPR on the guy who has the heart attack.
Angela [00:51:32] Mm-hmm.
Jenna [00:51:33] And they do the thing, and then you know what happens. His whole...
Angela [00:51:38] He explodes.
Jenna [00:51:40] His whole chest opens up and a giant mouth eats off the hands of the person who was doing the thing.
Angela [00:51:47] Yeah.
Jenna [00:51:48] Spoiler. Listen, it doesn't matter that I've told you, it's still gonna kick your ass when you see it.
Angela [00:51:56] Listen, that was disgusting. But honestly, the part when the dog exploded and then all the little things came out of him was worse for me. Once I had seen that, I could handle whatever else that thing had coming for everyone.
Jenna [00:52:12] Yeah.
Angela [00:52:12] The way it does absorb other people is so disgusting. The one guy on roller skates keeps finding people's clothes ripped and he's like, "Hey, you guys, do a better job cleaning up." I'm like, "they're dead, they are dead." What I also really liked about this movie was just how much time and patience the director had. He was so patient. He didn't rush any moment and I really liked that and then I thought the ending was just so good.
Jenna [00:52:42] So good.
Angela [00:52:43] It does not wrap up with a bow.
Jenna [00:52:45] Mm-mm.
Angela [00:52:47] And I really liked it. I really liked it!
Jenna [00:52:50] I'm so glad, lady. It's got great performances. It's great writing. It also has a little bit of that survivalist aspect to it. I'm always interested in things that are set in wilderness or the cold, you know? I love that it's just the isolation of these people, you now?
Angela [00:53:11] Oh, yeah. Winter has just set in. So they're just screwed. One of the comments I didn't share was the very first time I saw the giant ice cube. I was like, "Giant ice cube probably holds some kind of Frankenstein thing. Not good." But yeah, great movie. Great movie. I liked it. Thank you for suggesting it and not making me watch those other ones. That would have been too much for me.
Jenna [00:53:37] Well, I just have to say, lady, now that we know that I have watched Lord of the Rings and I've seen the orcs, I'm not sure there was much more about this movie that was more gory or terrifying than an orc being born in Lord of the Rings.
Angela [00:53:54] Oh, no, it's disgusting; the way they kind of plopped down in that gelatinous giant mud hole. No, it is so gross
Jenna [00:54:01] What is it about horror movies you don't like? Because it can't be the violence and the gore, because you watch very violent stuff all the time: Narcos, Game of Thrones, Lord of the Rings. What is it that you don't like?
Angela [00:54:14] Um, I don't like suspense.
Jenna [00:54:23] Ah, the stress of suspense.
Angela [00:54:24] I don't like waiting for the jump scare. Just get to it.
Jenna [00:54:28] Okay, that makes sense to me because a lot of the violence in Game of Thrones is revenge, or war, or something.
Angela [00:54:37] It's battle.
Jenna [00:54:37] You can do battle.
Angela [00:54:38] Yeah, when I see a battle scene, I'm like, "OK, they're here to fight. Shit's going to go down." But if I'm just walking into my kitchen late at night, pour myself a glass of milk, and then I open the fridge and I shut it and there's a guy there. I don't like it.
Jenna [00:54:52] I get it.
Angela [00:54:53] And I know it's coming. I know it's coming. Also, one of the things, like, right at the beginning of this movie, there's this (for no reason) establishing shot of a big tank of gasoline. I'm like, "Oh, they're gonna need that." Now I'm waiting. What do they need the gasoline for?
Jenna [00:55:14] All right, well, my heart is so happy. Thank you for the gift of watching this movie and for liking it. I did not know if you would. I just didn't expect you to like it, but I'm so glad you did.
Angela [00:55:24] It's really well done. There you go, you guys. Look at that. Jenna, just like in our friendship, we're just encouraging each other to grow and experience new things.
Jenna [00:55:36] This is a really exciting year.
Angela [00:55:38] We're in our 50's!
Jenna [00:55:40] And look at us!
Angela [00:55:41] We're doing it.
Jenna [00:55:42] This should prove to anyone, it's never too late to experience something new. All right, well, thank you everyone for joining us today. I love this webisode and I love today's episode.
Angela [00:55:54] Yeah, and thank you to Ellie Kemper for always answering my crazy text messages. We hope you guys have a great week.
Jenna [00:56:02] We'll see you next time.
audio cue [00:56:10] musical outro
Jenna [00:56:10] Thank you for listening to Office Ladies.
Angela [00:56:12] Office Ladies is a presentation of Audacy and is produced by Jenna Fischer and Angela Kinsey.
Jenna [00:56:18] Our executive producer is Cassi Jerkins, our audio engineer is Sam Kieffer, and our associate producer is Aynsley Bubbico.
Angela [00:56:26] Audacy's executive producers is Leah Reis-Dennis. Office Ladies is mixed and mastered by Bill Schultz. Our theme song is "Rubber Tree" by Creed Bratton.